What a Potential Employee Means: "I'M HONEST, HARD-WORKING AND DEPENDABLE:" I pilfer office supplies. "I'M EXTREMELY ADEPT AT ALL MANNER OF OFFICE ORGANIZATION:" I've used Microsoft Office. "MY PERTINENT WORK EXPERIENCE INCLUDES:" I hope you don't ask me about all the McJobs I've had. "I TAKE PRIDE IN MY WORK:" I blame others for my mistakes. "I'M PERSONABLE:" I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers. "I'M EXTREMELY PROFESSIONAL:" I carry a Day-Timer. "WHEN YOU NEED ME I'M THERE:" I'm there -- not here! "I AM ADAPTABLE:" I've changed jobs a lot. "I'M HIGHLY MOTIVATED TO SUCCEED:" The minute I find a better job, I'm gone! "I AM ON THE GO:" You'll never find me at my desk. "I AM CONSTANTLY ON THE GO:" I have serious intestinal problems.